today in Isaiah

I've been the biggest of slackers for working out this past week but I keep telling myself that the long walks I took last week to show Liz the city will have to make up for it. We did hike up Gellert Hill and walk ALL over the city.

Next week is going to be crazy walking and hosting and early mornings/late nights too. Not sure how many workouts I'll get in unfortunately. Now that I don't have a bike and finances are low making it difficult to get to the swimming pool, my training consists mainly of running. Have I mentioned it's my least favorite? But, stuck in this corner of only being able to run, maybe that's a good thing as the next few events I'm looking at are running events.

All this has shown me that there will always be seasons in life and sometimes you do better than others with different things. Right now I'm feeling unmotivated to run, run, run. I would much prefer to have a bike and mix it up on that or get to the pool. Well, enough complaining. For the next 5 months I just need to focus on running and quit complaining. I think I'll still be able to get a swim or spin class in here and there but it won't be consistent and I like consistency in training plans :D
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This morning I read a scripture I’ve read a thousand times before in Isaiah 54:10-11.

“Though the mountains be shaken and the hills be removed yet my unfailing love for you will not be shaken, nor my covenant of peace be removed says the Lord who has compassion on you. Afflicted city, lashed by storms and not comforted, I will rebuild you with stones of turquoise, your foundations with lapis lazuli. I will make your battlements of rubies, your gates of sparkling jewels and all your walls of precious stones.”

What noteably struck was the strength and tone these words deposited in my soul.

Have you ever felt as though the mountains of life were shaking around you, things about to come tumbling down? Sometimes when you’re left with yourself, it looks a lot like an afflicted city. Houston comes to mind at the moment. In my soul, there are times that Hurricane Self reaks havoc inside and I realize what’s deep within.

William Law once wrote, “We may justly condemn ourselves as the greatest sinners we know because we know more of the folly of our own heart than we do of other people’s. Therefore every sinner knows more of the aggravations of his own guilt than he does of other people’s, and consequently may justly look upon himself to be the greatest sinner that he knows.”

I’d like to say that I experience more of these times of self-reflection because it always leads me back as part of life’s journey to a place of faith. I'm not one of those people who gets stuck in it all....I find my way back to a good place but the process of recognizing where I am and where I want to be is good for the soul and that’s where I came this morning.

“….yet my unfailing love.”

Unfailing – constant, reliable, dependable, steadfast, endless, undying, unfading, inexhaustible, indefatigable, boundless, tireless, ceaseless.

I realized how quickly I come to the end of my reserves on my own. I get frustrated, irritated, overwhelmed and tired. My love for others is not constant but actually quite particular and picky. I’m not reliably full of genuine concern for others 24/7.
The past two days I found myself absolutely exhausted. Fatigue was high and personal reserves were low. It's amazing how different the world looks in these moments. Everything becomes dark and you wonder, where is the light? Things that would normally not even rock you tend to set me into a spiral of negative thoughts and emotions. And then I get to this place.

What kind of love is this that actually strengthens my frame and builds me up? I can only imagine in a relationship when both people are really in tune to each other and "on it" -- there to encourage and build each other up. It's that kind of encouragement to the soul that I found this morning from God and His word to me. What I found particularly striking is that as much as I've tried in the past, I cannot get this fuel “within myself” or even from my greatest friends and family. God alone holds this unfailing love and its in the face of this relationship that I’m strengthened. He is the architect of my life, designing, creating, inventing and building my life as I let Him. He is my companion, my partner in life. And it’s his unfailing love that I’m anchored to deeply and knit to that place of strength. I cannot get away from it, as hard as I may try or as long as I may go from it. He is there. He is strong. And I’m thankful. I’m thankful for his constant, reliable, dependable, steadfast, endless attention and love. No one else could ever take His place but together we can walk towards Him in life and encourage one another to go to Him as the source of life. I am so thankful today and actually refreshed as I bathe even just an hour in these truths. Amazing.