Undone but Take Your Time

I'm going to bare my soul for a moment. If you'd rather not be a part of this, move on my dear friend, just move on. :D

Just before transition takes place in my life, I usually sense that something is about to change. Normally, I can't put my finger on it, but it begins to happen about a year before the actual changes take place.

Most of the time in these transitional moments, I go through an internal dichotomy. The reason for this is because I like where I'm at but I realize something more awaits me in the future change and I love the excitement of a new adventure, new heights, new things. Wondering how it will all come together, I'm curious to know exactly where this next "roller coaster ride" will ultimately take me. Although I'm quite excitable about life in general, I'm not flighty. I like to have a plan and I like to organize things. All these things mixed together make for interesting times and I'm in one of those times right now.

It's best for me to view life as a book and there are chapters. I want the read to be a good one for all involved but I'm more concerned that at the end of my life, when I look back and read it, that I have no regrets. It's a struggle but I do try hard to fully embrace each moment.

On one side of the internal struggle I feel as though I'm a kid at the top of the most exciting roller coaster holding my breath as I look down into literally God knows what. I'm nervous but excited, even putting my hands in the air while letting out a throttling shriek as the take off begins. I can let go and embrace it all because I have full confidence that God, who is known as both the author and the finisher of my faith and my life, will guide, lead and direct this coaster to a very desirable place. I can fully trust as I wait to see what lies beneath the clouds of uncertainty that I'm about to blow through.

On the other side of the internal struggle there is doubt and a sense of tragic, impending doom that is surely awaiting me. It's as though that same kid at the top of the coaster realizes...."Wait a minute. I'm up WAY too high, there's NO turning back, and God only knows but this thing could run off track, flip over, and I'd be crushed, dying a premature death." Of course, I don't want that. So, can I get off this roller coaster?

I begin to re-evaluate. Things don't need to change. All is fine. I'm doing just fine right here. Why make waves? Who needs a fulfilled soul anyways? But I'm caught in the dichotomy because I know that change is coming. Yet, surely this will be my end as I come tumbling down to a frightening death and today is NOT a good day to die.

Back and forth, I sway beneath two opinions. And for whatever reason, this time moving into this next "chapter" of life has been one of the toughest. The weight of making decisions about the future while living in the present has left me with both extremes, excitement and a sense of impending death.

So where does my help come from?
I'm at the top of the roller coaster. Do I get off or stay on?

This week two friends out of the blue sent me encouraging notes. This is something absolutely sure about me. I need voices of truth in my life. Not only that, I need tons of encouragement. As much as I love to hand it out to others, it can get depleted quite easily and often. So I'm well aware that I've got to find genuine sources of encouragement for this soul.

One friend gave me a scripture to read and in being undone, I realize it's not the final chapter.
Isaiah 42:16 where God says,
"I will lead the blind by a way they don't know, in paths they don't know, I will guide them. I will make darkness into light, rugged places smooth. These are the things I will do. I won't leave them undone."

Undone: incomplete, half-done, unfulfilled, neglected, on the back burner, destroyed, doomed, washed up, toast.

And once again, I reach up, hands in the air, clinging tightly to the only One I know who can guide me in every season of my life as the wind lightly presses against my back and the roller coaster starts to gain speed.

God, thank you for being so real. Thank you for completing me, fulfilling me and helping me walk into everything my life was created for when you designed me.

More inspiration comes from the newest artist I've downloaded from I-tunes.
Simon Webbe, called "Take Your Time".

I know exactly what I'm talking about,
cos I've been there, I've been scared
So many deals that I've been in & then out,
turned dreams into nightmares
I realized my wants only criticized my needs
(I didn't make enough cheese)
I couldn't figure out my wrongs & I found it hard to breathe

Bridge:
Have a right to cry (sometimes)
When I'm under the weather
Feels like my world is coming down
And my job could be better
That's yesterday's news, maybe tomorrow this is what we can do

CHORUS
Seize the day, change your life
Find all of your limits in the sky
Take a moment, clear your mind
Believe that your angels never lie
Change is good, just keep it movin'
Uncover new colours that are kind
Different ways. Brand new heights
Don't worry just take your time and you'll be fine

Too many people get frightened of lightning
(Always strikes them in the same place twice)
Never seeking true guidance it might be,
They need a little direction in life

Bridge:
Have a right to cry (sometimes)
When I'm under the weather
Feels like my world is coming down
And my job could be better
That's yesterday's news, maybe tomorrow this is what we can do

CHORUS

You don't have to be fed-up each & everyday of your life
(Stop complaining just stop all the hating open your eyes)
And the world will be better if you believe & you try
(Stop complaining about what you can't get)
You won't know till you try