Cosmopolitan (part II)

This is the continuation of my Cosmopolitan story. If you haven't read part I, you might start there first.
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So....where was I?

Well, let's just say it was good that I landed several babysitting jobs for lawyers in Carson City. Not only did babysitting in the legal community broaden my world so that I heard interesting stories of courtroom cases and legal situations, but it actually gave me a vision for my future. At 12 years old, I decided I wanted to be a lawyer.

At the same time, I found myself in trouble with the law quite often. What a paradox. I've got lots of stories, but I guess you could say I wasn't the smartest kid when it came to being street-wise. My parents were often getting calls from the police for everything from toilet-papering, shoplifting, a hit-and-run accident (I wasn't the driver; my friend Mike was and I was begging him to pull over--by the way the teenager we hit was smoking pot and didn't even feel it. He left the scene shortly after,didn't press charges, because he didn't want to be caught for illegal drugs. My friend Mike, however, lost his license (rightfully so) until he was 18 years old), busted parties, and it just seemed like I couldn't stay away from trouble.

So at 15 years old, I ended up having a probation officer for a year. It's a long story that I may tell you once I know you better, but for me this became the breaking point. For the first time during my teenage years, I started thinking seriously about my life and trying to figure things out.

Why was I doing these things?

Is this who I really was or wanted to be?

Yes, I loved fun, adventure, friends. I was usually the one friends dared to do the crazy things and I'd do them too. But I was also the one that my drunk friends would come to with their problems. I could hardly handle my own. I didn't have anything for them. I wrote in a journal entry once "Everyone comes to me with their problems, but who do I have to go to?"

Although I never questioned the existence of God, His presence in the world seemed distant. I didn't understand Him. Going to Catholic mass was a religious duty for me at the time and I felt I had failed my parents and God completely. I wasn't about to try and make things right. These were the thoughts of a troubled teenager and honestly, most of the time, I felt really alone. Partying, boyfriends, getting into trouble was getting old and I started to take life a little more seriously. I started to do better in school and decided to try and get my grades up my junior year. I got a job in a law office in Carson City. I became a "runner" and organized files for two attorneys in an office of four attorneys. It was exciting, interesting, intriguing and became a positive place in my life for many reasons.

Besides the great work experience, I became friends with Sharon, one of the legal secretaries in the office. She was in her late 20's and had a very strong faith in Christ. One thing that bothered me about her (in a good way, looking back) is that her faith in Christ usually came out in some way or another during the week. She had character, opinions, convictions and sometimes she got on my last nerve because I was Catholic and I thought she should keep her faith to herself.

For Sharon, following and trusting Christ had everything to do with her life. I didn't understand it and frankly it bothered me.......sometimes her comments would haunt me at night. I was still busy partying and being with friends, but having a probation officer did something to me. I realized I didn't want to be a "bad kid." On the other hand, "religion" and going to mass wasn't really something I wanted either. I only went because I had to. It was for Sundays, fulfilling my duty. So I was trying to figure it all out. Her Jesus looked very little like the Jesus I knew from my childhood, yet He was so attractive. I secretly wanted to know more and I started the process of discovery. Who was Jesus anyways? And what did He have to do with life and specifically my world?

As these questions were answered, other questions followed. The ramifications of my discovery began to transform my heart, my life and my vision for the future. I began to realize there is purpose, destiny, design surrounding our every breath. And I became interested in many, many things.

The world became an open book and I realized I had actually only read just the first page! (part III coming soon, I hope!)